I thought co-parenting was easy before I actually became a parent. I assumed that all one really need do to make sure that their potential spouse was suited for the job of parenting was ask. But, I’ve learned that co-parenting is tricky.
Parenting, I’ve learned, is a unique phenomenon in that through it you see others’ cultural upbringings, their hidden assumptions, and their biases.
My husband is not American. He grew up in a large family (a LARGE family). His dad worked. His mom stayed home.
His cultural is an oral culture so books, or the phenomenon of reading books to your children is mostly foreign. Instead, stories were told, sometimes. But usually not because there is no real emphasis in his culture on treating children as individual, little beings who need to be given that kind of attention. Children in my husband’s culture mostly exist within the realm of their parent’s lives.
And in America, children are treated as little, individuals who should be given special consideration because they are small and still growing and impressionable. Children are written about, studied. They are given their own menus at most restaurants.
Here we have parenting books. In my husband’s culture, parenting traditions are passed down within families. It’s different.
Our differences aren’t so significant that they are worthy of disagreements on our parts. But they are significant enough to be noted in this blog post.
What did you learn about your spouse through co-parenting? What did you learn about yourself.