I read a post just now on a friend of mine’s blog that spoke to me. In the post she talked about how she often does care when she thinks someone doesn’t like her. She uses the example of a neighbor who seems close to everyone on the block except her. She goes through possible reasons why the neighbor doesn’t like her and ends with a realization, thanks to some wise words from her husband, that maybe when a person doesn’t like you, it has little to do with you and everything to do with them.
I think women often do care more about others’ perceptions. I know I seem to talk more about my concerns about people who seem not to like me. I don’t know why I care so much but I do care when someone seems to treat me differently than everyone else or when I think that someone has an issue with me.
I care too much about the people who I think don’t like me. And when I do this, I sometimes do become a people pleasure. I do try to win over people who don’t like me just because I think there is really no reason why anyone shouldn’t like me. (I say this even though this is a totally biased assumption.)
But I am learning to be different. I am learning to be okay with people in the world who may not like me, perhaps, because of how I dress, what I look like, or what my religion is. I’m okay with that. Even though I am not this kind of person, or the kind of person who would dislike someone just because of superficial reasons, I must acknowledge that there are some people out there like this. I can’t changed them. Even though the “fixer” in me wants to change them. I know I can’t.
Do you ever find yourself caring about the person or persons who you think dislike you for reasons that have never been voiced aloud?